Matt Parker and Trey Stone. They do it all the time, and they have done it again. This time though, not only did they do it, they did it in a manner and fashion worthy of Honorary commemoration.
Last Wednesdays episode of South Park bitch slapped(with lesbian hands no less) that garbage of a movie 300. As a Persian man child living in America, I have become accustomed to swallowing my pride when my culture is mis-represented, or not represented at all. So imagine my surprise when one of my favorite shows, a show that typically crucifies everyone and everything (sanz Cesar Millan, The Dog Whiiiiiiiiiiiisperer), decided to level the playing field at Thermopylae.
"We want all of you to know, that when we make this place another Club Persh, you are all 100% welcome. My boss wants you to know that you will not be discriminated against in any way. He just wants the place to look really nice". That line might seem simple enough, but in reality it embodies something much more grand. During the expansion of the Persian Empire, Cyrus the Great and Darius(his successor) did one thing in particular that helped curtail resentment and resistance: they allowed the peoples from those conquered lands the rights to retain their cultures and beliefs. They believed that that kind of freedom ought to be a given, and that the Empire should only work to enhance those presets. There was no notion of slavery with that expansion, contrary to King Leonidas's(actor Gerard Butler's) accusations. In fact, the Persian civilization was the first to free the Jews from their enslavement and allow them the ability to return to Jerusalem. The ancient empire itself was not built by the hands of slaves, but with paid labor, a force that employed woman as well.
The contrast between Xerses and Leonidas extended all the way into their sexuality, their masculinity. Effeminate dictator vs. the embodiment of macho ism. Oh the sweet sweet taste of redemption: In D-Yikes(the South Park episode) the Persians adversaries were a group of lesbians, a clear reference to the ancient Greeks openly homosexual, bi-sexual and even young boy-sexual nature. I personally have no objection to someones homosexual and/or bi-sexual preferences, it's their business(can't say the same about the child loving however), but when someone attempts to use that kind of tone to try to gain a moral and more masculine upper hand, then it's only fair to have a lesbian woman, who used to be a straight woman, who used to be a gay man with a twig hand puppet alter-ego, who used to be a straight man with a regular hand puppet alter-ego represent that very symbol of machismic supremacy.
All in all I found 300 to be a huge disappointment for reasons other than the ethnocentric ones listed above and read between the lines. Special effects were not all that, the dialogue and script was 'English as a second language' at best, and the acting was just embarrassing. The fact that my culture and people were unapologetically portrayed as Satan worshiping, merciless, disfigured, totally brainwashed, in-compassionate, not to mention testicle-less and fascists I felt was totally unnecessary. The Greeks are credited for manufacturing western democracy, and in this movie in particular also credited for somehow saving the whole concept itself from muddy pits destined to be where the Persians would have thrown it had they beaten the Greeks in the Persian-Greco wars. No doubt the world would have been a totally different place had those wars gone a different route, but perhaps that route would have been adorned with Persian democratic principles(not to mention rugs of remarkable beauty) already being shaped within the borders of that ancient empire, at least equaling if not surpassing, the Greek ones we see today. One look at where Persia was in comparison to Europe during the dark ages seem to suggest so.
So thank you Matt and Trey, you are my Honorary Persians for the week. Shit even for the year. I'd give you a medal or a ribbon but, I have a feeling you wouldn't like any Gucci accessories that only a Persian would think was cool.
D-Yikes Clip:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=QPZfr2JqJAk&mode=related&search
The History Channels "Engineering An Empire: Persia":
http://youtube.com/watch?v=eKN-gZuSH2o
5 comments:
Great stuff ... great style : )
t.
I would like to add, that i feel the Persians were more democratic. If you look at the history of the Greeks and the role of women in society, the two cultures do not even compare. In Greece women were not even considered citizens and were thought of as being less worthy than slaves as they had no monetary value. Interestingly this is at a time when the head of the Persian navy was a woman!!! This movie was pure propaganda and entirely historically inaccurate. Its a shame that the people of this country do not have enough historical knowledge to differentiate between fact and fiction.
It is a shame. I guess you can't really have expectations when they are negligent about their own history. There seems to be little desire for cultural representations if the culture happens to not be relevant to the current state of this society. Historical movies are a bore unless frat house inmates across campuses can't hold hands as they watch and relate. How sad it is that truth is less valuable than entertainment.
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